nineteen; [voice] in which life is not excellent and my cat chews through my fingers.

[onlyapparate]

[ Thobari's room sounds awfully quiet (Anna is out). Except maybe for a tiny meowing sound in the background. Raphael has taken to consoling him by chewing on his fingers. Thobari doesn't even seem to care. ]

I... I don't understand. I tried, really I did, but... This is just like back then. There are no second chances; only the decisions we make and I... made the wrong one once again. I wasn't strong enough. I'll never be strong enough.

...She'll be happier without me. It's understandable, of course. I knew about it, and yet... I couldn't stop myself. I should have known that I'm still so weak... I can't save lives, I can't save relationships; I can't save anyone.

Times like these make me wonder why I keep trying so hard.

[[Okay, so this post is 100% unhackable to Kallen and everyone else, basically. For Yukimi, Spencer and Kate, it's like 40% hackable, so you might hear some stuff about him being weak and whatnot. For Maron, this is 90% hackable (everything but the strikes) and for Cas, yeah, it's 100%.]]

Comments

it's okay, tickets are free 8D

[onlyapparate]

It's--Ah... Don't worry yourself. Though I hear you've been talking to Kallen? I really appreciate your concern.

I'm going to try to give her some space and... hopefully pick myself up in time to win her back when she's ready.

[ Semi-optimism, go! Kind words have done Tobi good. ]

Private

[noheatnikki.livejournal.com]

I tried to talk to her, Thobari. I really did. I just think she's been so hurt in the past that she can't look at the situation rationally at the moment. Give her time.

And since we're both at the castle, we could...hang out?

*Kate really sucks at feelings.*

I mean, we don't know each other all that well, but I'm here if you need to talk.

Private

[onlyapparate]

She's strong, it's... just translating into stubbornness right now, I think.

But, sure. I'd like that. We should meet for lunch or something like that.

Re: Private

[noheatnikki.livejournal.com]

Lunch sounds great! I've been a little lonely lately, so it will be good for both of us.

Just let me know when you're free.

Re: Private

[onlyapparate]

That's right, you haven't met many of the other teachers yet, have you? The retreat's coming up soon, that should be good.

Sure thing! Hopefully it'll be soon, but after this whole confusion with Kallen is solved.

Re: Private

[noheatnikki.livejournal.com]

Yes, I've only met a few teachers, and some more through their journals, but not many. I've been in the States for so long that I've pretty much lost touch with all of my old friends from this side of the pond. I'd like to meet some new people.

Re: Private

[onlyapparate]

It'll be a lot of fun, I hope! I haven't been to one yet, but I hear last year's was... lively, to say the least.